


No Hard Feelins

by The Little MerBucky (blue_pointer)



Series: A Different Start [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Best Friends, Blackouts, Brooklyn Boys, Brooklynese, Canon Divergence - Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Coitus Interruptus, Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt feelings, M/M, Oral Sex, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Podfic Welcome, Second Chances, Seduction, Stark Spangled Soldier - Freeform, Stark Spangled Winter - Freeform, Stony - Freeform, Stucky - Freeform, Suicide Attempt, Threesome - M/M/M, kick drum heart, relationship troubles, someone please check on Tony, stonucky - Freeform, stuckony - Freeform, while you were away, winterironshield - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-01-08
Packaged: 2018-09-15 17:18:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9247655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_pointer/pseuds/The%20Little%20MerBucky
Summary: In a universe where Zemo failed to reveal the secret of December 16, 1991, Civil War ends quite differently.When Steve returns from a mission to find out that his ex and his buddy have taken a shine to one another, he lets them pull him into an only slightly reluctant threesome. But Bucky has a hidden agenda. Things go to hell in a handbasket when he tries to put his plan into action. Harm is done. Steve and Bucky have a long talk about relationships.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This picks up _exactly_ where Kick Drum Heart left off, and is long overdue.

Steve backs up as they approach the door, but Bucky can feel the impatience radiating from him. He sets Tony down, and no sooner has he done so than Steve is jerking Bucky close for an almost violent kiss, with plenty of groping involved. “Steve--” Bucky tries to protest, because he knows Tony will be feeling left out, but then he loses the train of thought because Tony presses up behind him. He knows just how, too, fitting his edges into Bucky’s curves and sliding gentle hands over his hips. He can feel those hands move between them, testing both his and Steve’s excitement levels.  
  
Steve groans, practically chewing on Bucky’s lower lip. His excitement is clear. “You sure I can’t pitch to him, Cap?” Tony murmurs, teasing. “He’s so warm…”

“Tony!”

Bucky has to step in again. “Steve, he is fucking with you. Buy a vowel. Get a clue.”

“Buy a vowel?”

Tony is laughing. “Okay, while Cap tries to puzzle that one out, I wanna draw some vowels on someone. Volunteers?”

Bucky sighs. “Don’t act like you haven’t already chosen Steve.”

“Hey.” Tony grips Bucky’s junk. “You know I love going down on you, sugarbear. Don’t be jealous.”

“I’m not jealous.” And he’s honestly not. “Steve, take your pants down.” The way he’s looking at Bucky, he wants one of _them_ to do it. “Oh, for cryin’ out loud.” Bucky flips open the button and yanks Steve’s pants down around his knees.

With a whimper of anticipation, Tony slides down and tugs the waistband of Steve’s shorts with him. The noises he makes after that are more evocative of what he’s doing. Bucky watches Steve’s eyes close with pleasure, admiring the way his long, long eyelashes curl gracefully away from his cheeks. He takes Steve’s face in his hands and kisses his forehead, the bridge of his nose, his lips. Steve moans, holding Bucky close and kissing him more while Tony swallows his cock.

“I’m gonna go prep,” Bucky whispers between kisses. “I’ll be right back. You two do what you gotta do.” Steve whines when Bucky tries to move away. But Bucky has carefully calculated this. If he takes himself out of the picture early, it will give the two of them time to physically mend some fences. If he ends up getting left out, well. It’s fine. He pauses in his exit as someone grips the waistband of his pants.

“You’re coming back.” Tony has actually left off sucking Steve’s dick to give him a stern look. Bucky bends down to kiss him on the cheek.

“Don’t look now, honey, but there’s a cock in your face.” He licks it, teasingly, before backing off, feeling vindicated at the noise he elicits from Steve in doing so.

“Buck, come back,” he whines.

“I’ll be back in a minute, Stevie,” Bucky tells him, hugging Steve from behind and pressing a warm kiss to the back of his neck. He watches Tony go back to sucking Steve’s dick for a minute, enjoying the show, before heading toward the bathroom. This is the hard part. Bucky sits on the toilet and waits. He only wrings his hands a little. This is the right decision. It will help smooth things over between Steve and Tony.

He puts the hem of his shirt in his mouth, worrying it with his teeth. Rests his forehead in his hands, leans forward with his elbows on his knees. It really shouldn’t be that long now. Finally, Bucky sighs and turns on the shower. A shower is always good. He climbs in and lies down in the tub. Oops. Takes his shirt off. The pants don’t matter. Not really. He turns the hot water on full, rests his head against the rim of the tub. After a while, the steam starts to make him drowsy. It’s better. He doesn’t have to think.

Bucky can’t hear anything but the rush of water and blood in his ears. It’s quiet, almost peaceful. No, there’s some sort of vibration disturbing his peace. He doesn’t want to wake up. He realizes he locked the door behind him a second before the wood splinters inward, the door itself shattering against the wall next to him. _Holy shit, Steve_ , he thinks, but he’s still half-asleep. Can’t talk.

“Bucky! Bucky!” The shower curtain is jerked aside, and there he is, their nude Adonis, bending down to lift his head up, make sure he’s okay.

“Stop yellin’,” Bucky slurs.

Steve makes the mistake of touching his metal arm, and curses, pulling his hand away. “Jesus, you’re way too hot!”

“‘m fine. You and Tony go…” He waves them back into the bedroom. “Go.” Tony stands in the doorway in a similar state of undress. There’s something charming about the fact neither of them is ashamed of their unclothed state.

“Are you kidding me, Barnes?” Why is Tony so angry? He stalks over, his eye for minute detail seeing what Steve hasn’t yet, kneeling down at the edge of the tub, cradling Bucky’s face in desperate hands. A flash of metal, and the straight razor goes flying across the room to bounce off the tile.

“What the hell?” Steve glances over. “Oh my god.” Through half-shut eyes, Bucky watches the color leave his face.

Tony is pointing at him, spitting mad. “You’re not allowed to do this! Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing. You think I can’t read between the lines of half the things you said when Cap first left you here? Well newsflash, James Buchanan! You’re not allowed to do this to me! You’re not allowed to let people care about you and then just take yourself out of the picture! The arrogance--yeah, that’s right; I know, because I’m the king of it--the arrogance that you just know what’s best for everyone, so you get to make the decision, well you don’t!” Bucky knows Tony’s masks well enough, he can see this one is breaking. He gasps back tears and runs out of the room before they happen.

This is not what Bucky had planned. It wasn’t supposed to go like this. It was supposed to make Tony happy. It was for him…

Steve’s voice beside him is so quiet. “Is he right?” The words are clipped. He’s holding back. “You were gonna use it?”

Bucky’s head still feels so fuzzy. He should turn the water off. “Hand to god, Steve. I don’t even remember picking it up.” And that’s the truth. He has no idea how it got there, but he knows it wasn’t there when he first came in here. Ergo, he must have put it there. That’s scary. He’d thought his blackouts were over.

“I believe you,” Steve tells him gently, his face full of sympathy. Bucky is so damned tired of sympathy. He’ll never stop being the cripple with the one arm and the soft brain that can’t remember the simplest thing from one moment to the next.

“You should go after ‘im, Steve.” Bucky’s Tony instinct is telling him that the little genius isn’t in the next room anymore.

“Maybe,” Steve says, bending down to get his arms under Bucky. “But I’m kinda focused on keeping you among the living right now.” He stands up, and the movement makes Bucky’s head worse. So dizzy.

“Steve, I swear--”

“Save it.” Steve’s lips are pursed. “What does it matter if you meant to do it or not? You did it.” The colder air of the bedroom is kind of a shock after the tropical jungle of the bath.

“Steve--”

“Buck.” One of the differences--so many differences between his little Steve and Captain America--Steve could never nail you to the cross with his eyes the way this guy can. It’s palpable.

“I’m sorry.” Bucky can feel his weak foundations start to crumble.

“Yeah. I know.” And he’s not talking about the apology. Steve knows him too well, even now. Even after all this time. He sees Bucky’s about to fall apart. “Look, I know you care about Tony, and that’s great.” He walks Bucky over to the bed and lays him down, pulls the blankets up over him and starts to tuck him in, methodically, like making hospital corners around a person. “But he’s a grown man, Buck. If he’s upset, you gotta let him go an’ be upset.”

“Is that seriously how you handle Tony’s temper tantrums?” _No wonder he’s such a wreck,_ he thinks.

“I can’t worry about Tony right now.” Steve is keeping his hands busy, looking everywhere but at Bucky. Classic avoidance. “I’m worryin’ about you.”

“I’m fine.” Even Bucky doesn’t believe it this time. Steve doesn’t even respond.

“Tony’ll get over it in his own time. He always does.”

“Steve…” Surely he knows better. “You don’t really believe that?”

Busy busy busy. “Sometimes the only thing you can do is put yourself back together and move on.”

“Sublimate everything.”

“Right.”

“Let it fester over time.”

“Buck.”

“Put a band-aid over a gaping wound.”

“What are we talkin’ about here?”

“What do you wanna talk about?”

Steve sits down on the bed next to him. “How ‘bout why you thought you could just walk away from us and we’d be fine with it?”

“You’re both better off--” Steve covers Bucky’s mouth with his fingers.

“That’s what I’m worried about. You really think that, don’t you?”

Bucky nods. He doesn’t just think it; he knows it.

Steve lets his hand fall away. “Damnit. I gotta call Sam.”

Bucky grabs Steve’s wrist before he can go. “Don’t call Sam.” He can see Steve debating while he looks at him. “Stevie, if you’re not gonna go after Tony, stay here. Just stay here with me. Okay?”

Steve, being Steve, takes the time to pull on his pants--no shorts--before sliding under the blankets next to the tightly-rolled Bucky burrito he’s just made.

“Hey,” Bucky says softly, looking at him nose to nose. Steve just strokes his face, his eyes glued to Bucky’s in an almost desperate way.

“So,” he finally says, “You wanna tell me what that was all about?”

Bucky wants to turn away and hide his face in the pillow. He doesn’t need this interrogation from Steve. Especially right now, when Tony is somewhere alone, suffering. Bucky is fine. He will always be fine. And if he’s not fine, what difference does it make?

“Buck? You don’t wanna talk to me, I can call Sam.”

Bucky frowns, annoyed. “Steve--”

“What? You gonna go off on me, Buck? ‘Cause I’m okay with you bein’ pissed at me, but this--whatever that was just now? That scares the shit outta me.”

“I’m not pissed at you,” Bucky concedes. “I just--Tony needs us.”

Now Steve looks angry. “What the hell--what is this, Buck? All I’ve heard since I got back is ‘Tony, Tony, Tony.’ What about Bucky?”

“Bucky is fine,” he tells Steve firmly.

“Yeah. So fine he just tried to off himself in the middle of sex.”

It’s not funny, but it makes the corners of Bucky’s mouth curl in an almost-smile. “Stevie, that’s--that’s not how it was.” Serious face.

But Steve has caught on to the utter absurdity of what he just said, and goes for it, almost-smiling himself. “I mean, was it really that bad?” He pokes Bucky in the ribs.

“Steve.” Bucky is suddenly 100% bona fide serious. “Don’t.”

“What?” Steve asks, all innocence. “You ain’t still ticklish, are ya?” He scoots closer, making Bucky nervous. “My best pal from Brooklyn used to be real ticklish. But Winter Soldier...I figure they beat that outta him.”

“Stevie.” Bucky’s using his warning tone.

“Should we check?” He raises one hand above the sheets, index finger extended.

“No.”

“Sure?” He pokes his finger under Bucky’s jaw, making him cringe, starting to draw it down his neck.

“Yes, I’m sure!” Bucky starts to swat at him, squirming.

“I dunno…” Steve leans in to kiss him in spite of the swatting, his tickling hand going for Bucky’s armpit.

“STEVE DON’T!” And there it is; he manages to backhand Steve in his flailing. At least Bucky got him with his human hand. “Oh god.” Steve stays turned away, and Bucky is terrified he’s just given him a black eye. “I warned you--”

But then he looks up, Bucky’s sassy little pal from the Heights, grinning and rubbing his jaw. “Okay, I deserved that.”

“Yeah, you did!” Bucky swats at him some more. “Stevie, what are you even doing?” He sighs, anxious. “Please go check on Tony.”

“No.” Steve scoots closer, pulling Bucky to him.

“I’m serious, Steve.”

“I know you are, Buck.” He’s brushing the hair back from Bucky’s face, not listening to a word. “And so am I.”

“Steve.”

“Buck.”

“I’m worried about ‘im.”

“I’m worried about you.”

Bucky’s starting to get angry. “Don’t be a punk.”

“Buck.” Steve takes a deep breath. “You’re actin’ crazy.”

A little more angry. “Whaddayou mean?”

“You just tried to off yourself.”

“I told you, I don’t even remember--”

“--and you’re more worried about Tony’s feelings than yourself. I don’t mind tellin’ you: I got a serious problem with that.”

Bucky’s mouth shuts with a snap. He’s not sure what to say to that. “Well--”

“So why don’t you start off by tellin’ me how the two of you buried the hatchet?”

Bucky snorts a laugh in spite of himself. From the look on Steve’s face, he knew exactly what he was saying and how it might be received.

“Come on. Spill.” Bucky lets his head fall back against the pillow. “Come on. You can’t spring somethin’ like this on me and expect me to just swallow it without some explanation.”

Bucky snorts again, but then Steve threatens to tickle him. “STOP, I give! Jesus, I give.” He takes a deep breath.

“I dunno, Stevie, it was like. You left, and he just. Hated me, you know? I tried not to be in the same room with ‘im. It was just easier.” He shrugs. “You think it’d be simple in this place, but somehow, he was always just there, or like. He’d pass through the room if I was out of mine. You know?”

Steve rubs his forehead. “Yeah. I know.”

“And then it was...I dunno. One week, he went from telling me ‘Sleep tight, hope you don’t wake up in the morning’ to ‘Oh by the way, that milk expired yesterday.’ I dunno how to say it. He just got real sassy. Giving me lip left and right. Sometimes I thought he’d pass through a room where I was just to drop some one-liner, you know?”

Steve has his eyes covered. “I know.”

“So one day--I can’t remember--it comes out I used to love his dad’s inventions. ‘Member?”

Steve’s looking at him now. Smiling, sad. “Yeah, Buck.” He rests a hand on his cheek. “I remember.”

“So he invites me to come hang out in the garage while he works on stuff. And I start doing it regular-like. Just the two of us. Just kind of being in the same room, like a truce. He would show off whatever he was working on, and I would be all impressed--genuinely. Then one of his droids started pokin’ me, so I started talking to it. And the next thing I knew his sass got a lot more...friendly? More teasing than mean?” Bucky’s trying to put it in order in his head, but it’s hard. It all seemed to happen so fast. “I dunno.” He shrugs. “It became just...more normal, like one guy giving another guy shit. So I started givin’ it back.”

Steve’s nodding, looking a little apprehensive.

“And then--” Bucky pauses. Is this gonna piss Steve off? “Then he started doing shit like. He was constantly having to bend over and grab stuff while we were talking. One day he just goes, ‘OOPS I dropped my lug nut!’ and he just bent all the way down and touched his toes.

“And I go ‘holy shit, this guy is flirting with me!’” He watches Steve for any potential top-blowing. But he’s still just listening, kind of straight-faced. “‘Doesn’t this guy know I’m a killer? Like what the hell?’ So I just started watching him after that. It got more and more so I couldn’t really not say something.”

“What’d you say, Buck?” Steve’s voice sounds a little too controlled.

“I said ‘get your ass outta my face, you don’t know what you’re doin’.’

“And he said ‘yes I do.’

“And I said ‘No you really don’t.’

“And he said, ‘Is your dick as big as Cap’s?’

“And I said, ‘Wouldn’t you like to know?’

“And he said, ‘Yeah, that’s why I asked.’

“And I said, ‘Keep bendin’ over like that in front o’ me and you’ll find out.’ So he did.”

“And then?” Bucky looks away, guilty. “So...you slept with him?”

“Well...not right then. But eventually. Yeah.”

Steve nods like an understanding dad. To Bucky, it’s kind of creepy how rational he’s being. “Did either of you think, ‘what’s Steve gonna think of this when he gets back?’”

“Well.” Bucky decides to be honest. “Not at first. Mostly we just did it in every room in the Tower.” He bites his lip. “I’m sorry, Stevie. He’s just so little.” This comment would probably make no sense to someone who is not Steve. “And such a flirt.”

Steve sighs. “Yeah, I know. Trust me.”

“You mad?”

Steve tugs him close again and rubs his back. “No, Buck. I’m not mad. But having sex is different from caring about somebody…”

“Well.” Bucky pillows his head on Steve’s shoulder. “The more time we spent together, the more he opened up. And I realized. Mostly he was doing it--doing me--to spite you. ‘Cause he’s still in love with you. So much. And it was killing him.”

“Get out.”

“I’m serious. He never had someone like you, Steve. I mean. There’s only one Steve Rogers.”

“Stop it.” Steve seems to have had enough talking about Tony.

“You know I’m right.”

“You’re biased.”

Damn right he is. “Shut up.”

“You shut up.”

“Shut up shuttin’ up.” He flicks Steve’s nose, playfully.

“So you decided you were gonna get us back together.”

Bucky cringes a little. “No. But I figured...if. If we could make it okay...with the three of us, maybe then the two of you could mend your fences. You know?”

“And you’d just leave.”

Bucky is quiet. That was the plan, yes. But it doesn’t seem to be working out so far.

“Dammit.” Steve sighs. “We gotta find Tony.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Bucky frees an arm from his burrito-shroud and paws at the bedside table until he gets the drawer open, fishing his cell phone out.

“You gonna call ‘im?” Steve guesses.

“Nope. Something way more reliable.”

Steve’s impressed to see Bucky somehow learned to type cyrillic characters on his phone. Steve can’t do that. Not that he’s ever needed to. “Easter?”

“Just trust me, Stevie.” He puts the phone down. “Help me find my clothes?”


End file.
